just reading...

like i said in my last blog entry, i was reading your previous entries today...

sigh... i just realized how much misery i brought to you... how come i cant just bring you happiness instead =( why do i make life that much harder and that much more drama for you... you said that you want a simple life with less drama... so what have i done =(

i have brought you nothing but drama that you dont need... if only nothing happened between us, then you'd be moving along in your relationship happily, although i truthfully cant say that you and him would be much more happier if i didnt re-enter your life, but at least you would not have anyone to compare him to

ahh... but having said that... i cant let it go... whether or not what happens, i cant bring myself to forget what i have in my heart... please help me, i want you to be happy, but i have to selfishly say that i want to be happy too... argg... see how horrible i am.

you also had another entry saying that you never tell anyone to wait for someone in another relationship, all i have to say is that i am very stubborn, i dont listen to advice that well...

please allow me to be selfish and dont hate me for it... or maybe you can hate me... hate me that i m ruining what you have... hate me that i've caused you this unnecessary drama, i dont know what i'm saying anymore

i always say i just want you to be happy, but i keep ruining that happiness that you've gathered... i too am a liar and selfish...

sorry


*i apologize for this depressing entry, but i've currently entered this slump... hopefully i'll eventually pick myself up*